Does Forgiveness Mean You Have to Marry? – 2

Responding to your letter. I believe the main thing you are dealing with is loss, and an accompanying broken heart. You became emotionally attached to these two women, and that activated all of your longings and yearnings for a life partner you could trust and build a life together. Your biblical values are right on, yet the loss has been severe enough to cause you to questions them. This exacerbates your "trauma" because it calls into question what you believe about and have trusted in God. Finding out that these two girls had been sexually involved with another man (especially a non-Christian) has hurt you deeply because you have lost several things, such as: A sense of … [Continue reading]

Does Forgiveness Mean You Have to Marry? – 1

Does forgiving someone's sexual past mean you have to marry the person? This young man's letter echoes the struggle many are facing. This story shows some effects of premarital sex in a relationship that can be detrimental if not addressed properly. It's quite long, so the response is posted separately. I'm a 25-year old single male from a Christian family with strong moral values and very active in my local community church. I'm not quite sure whether the issue I’m dealing with stems from suppressed anger, giving forgiveness, trauma, or all of the above. But I know when and why it started and I feel that I never completely dealt with it and it has developed into something more … [Continue reading]

Keep It Above the Belt

No touching below the belt rule

I am a 20-year old female college student. I have always desired to remain abstinent until marriage and fully intend to keep that promise to myself and to God. My boyfriend is a 27-year old professional who lives in a remote town and is very … [Continue reading]

The Moves

by J. Budziszewski This Office Hours column is the conclusion to "Who's on First?", (May 13, 2002), which should be read first. You can read the original column here. "So does anything work?", Mark was saying. "What are the moves of … [Continue reading]